Hickory-Dickory-Dock: Nevada Politics - Oscar Goodman's Problem with Homeless
A Modest Proposal by The City of Las Vegas
Las Vegas has once again distinguished itself in the eyes of the world. Or, was it a global cringe?
The city dedicated to glamour, greed and gluttony has declared war on hungry homeless people. A modest proposal that would do Jonathan Swift justice has become law! It's now a misdemeanor punishable by a $1,000 fine AND 6-months in jail to feed a hungry homeless person in Las Vegas. Arrests have already been made!
Mayor Oscar Goodman and the City Council should get a lot of credit for their "perfect solution". In a city that works 24hrs-a-day, 365 days a year, contributing to the homeless herd, the Mayor says, "people who feed the homeless in the parks aren't really helping them".
The Mayor wants the homeless to depend on his System for food and care. Will give 'em COOKIES, Oscar declares.
But homeless aren't inclined to trust the Government; many have been "institutionalized", too large a number are disillusioned war veterans (this is the fastest growing group), and the rest include ENRON investors, Katrina victims, and Liberal Democrats.
Of course, many legal questions remain. The ACLU has already filed suit. They think an individual's Right to Eat is protected by the Constitution (the pursuit of happiness includes eating) and the Bill of Rights.
Another grave legal question standing in the wings of this drama is just what is a "homeless" person? If you're home is a VW Bus, can you legally accept food? Or, what if you have a home, but they haven't foreclosed yet? Or, maybe you have a home, but your wife won't let you in it?
If confronted by the Police, do you have to show the title to your home? Will a photo do?
Does it matter how much food you charged with giving the hungry homeless? If an apple is a misdemeanor, then Thanksgiving dinner must be a felony!
Are we only talking only about food, or is drink included in the offense? Does Ensure count?
Imagine! You can go to jail in Las Vegas for slipping a banana to someone who doesn't have an address! A lot of people are in trouble!
You could be locked up with serial killers, perverts, and the criminally insane. Do you really want to tell them you're there for feeding a homeless guy?
So, what you do in Las Vegas stays there... unless you feed the hungry homeless. Then you get arrested, finger printed and a mug-shot. If you can’t control your feeding frenzy, you might find yourself featured on America's Most Wanted!
Las Vegas is like the City of Oz. It's a fantasy beyond imagination; from rollercoasters to Roman statues, jousting knights to world class fights, the Pyramids to Paris. It's a Mirage; you see it but you don't believe it.
That, too, has been the reaction to the new ordinance making it illegal to feed homeless people in public parks. People don't believe it.
